When Christmas Time Was Awkward
by FeatherQuill12
Summary: After Remus worries he has flirted slightly too much with Sirius, he tries to avoid him as much as possible. However, everyone knows that Sirius Black will always find a way to get what he wants, even if it does mean sitting on a freezing cold wall...in the snow...in only a t-shirt. Wolfstar. Rated T for swearing.


**A/N Hey guys so I am taking a small break from 'Happiness delivered in a note' simply because inspiration is getting increasingly difficult at the moment so I thought I might get some of my creative juices flowing by writing one of my favorite** **pairings again. WolfStar!**

**Also I don't have a Beta anymore so sorry if there are any mistakes but message me if you wanna Beta read for me?**

**Enjoy!**

This was awkward. It shouldn't have been but boy was it. Sirius wasn't exactly sure what to say and Remus was worried of saying the wrong thing. He was always worried to say the wrong thing. This was but one of the things Sirius found endearing and adorable about Remus Lupin. Sure the young werewolf could act like a total badass at times, slagging off Snape and coming up with some of their most dastardly plans but underneath it all, Sirius knew, he was awkward. Long gangly arms were hidden by a beige knit jumper and his face, his beautiful, scarred face was half embedded in the tartan scarf that was twisted, python-like around his pale neck. His legs were encased in too-small, khaki trousers and on his feet were two very worn, fur lined boots. He wrung his hands to keep them warm and fidgeted on the cold, snowy wall. Sirius was his counterpart in every way. He was confident no matter what and was, almost always, out of control. James had called him mad for going out in nothing but a t-shirt and black jeans, and although Sirius was starting to think he was right, he just couldn't bring himself to care about the snow settling on his bare arms or melting in his matted hair. All he could think about was what had lead them to this moment, on this freezing wall.

"Hey Moony!" Sirius yelled down the corridor, trying to keep up with the sandy haired boy.

"Not now, Sirius! I have to go see Dumbledore about something." Remus huffed.

"Ooh! About what? Is it a," Sirius cupped his hands abound his lips and mouthed 'werewolf.' "Kind of problem?"

"No, Pads. It's a my-best-friend-wont-leave-me-alone-for-five-seconds-of-the-day kind of problem." Remus retorted, smirking.

"Well, that's rather harsh, Moony."

"Sorry, Pads, the truth hurts."

"Ouch! Can I make it up to you by saying you look fantastic in those trousers today?"

"Nobody looks fantastic in brown trousers, Sirius, they're all I had left."

"I could always swap with you, right here, right now?"

"You are insufferable."

"Huh, see _I _always thought you liked having me around all this time. To talk to." Sirius stepped in front of Remus successfully stopping him in his tracks. The corridors had cleared now, everyone was either in the Great Hall or their Common Rooms.

"Well, I am afraid you were very much mistaken there, Pads, you are in fact the bane of my existence."

"Aww Moony, I'm hurt!" Sirius put on his best puppy dog eyes and pouted at the werewolf.

"I'd kiss it better but we both know how that could end up." His eyes widened at his comment, a look of horror passing through them and he opened his mouth to speak. Sirius slowly smirked. It had always been Sirius who flirted, never Remus, and did he just imply that the only reason he that the only reason he wouldn't kiss him was because it might lead to sex...because it sure sounded that way.

"Do we now? Would you care to elaborate?"

Remus coughed and walked around Sirius, heading towards Dumbledore's office. "I, um, I really have to go now."

"Moony! Wait!"

But it was too late. He was gone and, for the first time since they became friends, he felt awkward.

* * *

><p>"Moony!" The common room was lit with the light of the flames in the fire place. Red and orange bounced from the gold in the room making it seem even more Gryffindor-ish, if that were even possible. The light bounced from Sirius' hair and made it shine.<p>

"O-oh, hey Sirius." Remus's voice cracked and Sirius couldn't help but notice how the light glistened from his eyes. His eyes. A swirling pool of golds and yellows. Like someone had taken the sunset, splashed gold paint all over it and put it in a person. The gold highlighted the subtle hints of green, scattered around the edges of the golden pool, framed in a forest of sandy blonde lashes. Sirius sighed. "Um, Pads? Why are...you staring like that?"

"What? Oh! Um...no reason. Anyway! About earlier..." Sirius started.

"No! You don't have to say sorry, it's okay, I went too far." His eyes were cast downwards at the embroidered rug.

"Moony wait-"

"It's okay! Really... I'm just going to go to bed. Night."

And once again he was gone. Sirius sighed in frustration and leaned his head back against the couch. Why? Why did he fuck everything up? He had the chance of this perfect guy and he wasn't taking it and it was all because said perfect guy was too damn awkward.

No

It was his own fault.

And he was going to do something about it.

He launched himself from his seat and ran up the wooden steps, probably waking everyone in his path but who the hell cared? He crashed into the room and bounded over to Remus' bed.

"Remus!"

He stopped. There, under three different blankets, wrapped up in blue plaid pajamas was the werewolf. His pink lips were slightly parted, air wheezing past them, claggy from his winter cold. His sandy hair was splayed out on his pillow in a golden halo and his long lashes cast shadows on his porcelain cheeks. he was curled up, one hand under his head and his knees tight to his chest. A small furrow in his brow was increasing by the second and his mouth was turning downwards.

"Mum...the eyes...its dark...it hurts." Sirius stood, silently. He was having a nightmare and Sirius was pretty sure he knew what it was about.

The story had been told hushed, around a fireplace, only once. All brows furrowed and all eyes wide. the story of the eyes in the darkness, the young boy in the garden, looking out to the woods. His mothers screams and the darkness that engulfed him as his flesh was ripped from his body.

Sirius couldn't bear it. He reached out slowly, his fingers stretching out one by one until they found the sandy hair. Starting at his forehead he ran his hand through the locks until the frown had subsided and the furrow was no more. He had half wanted to lean down and kiss the frown away but he couldn't, not when he was asleep. What would it mean? He realised then that that was what he wanted. Not a grand gesture or a spontaneous show. Sirius wanted it to mean something. And this sparked a new idea in the boy's head.

* * *

><p>The Great Hall was nice today. Most people had gone home for Christmas and there were only about fifty students in the Great hall. No Slytherins, some Ravenclaws and a lot of Hufflepuffs and Gryffindors. Not that many were in the Great Hall at all. Remus had a book. This was another thing that made remus happy. Nothing went together best than a book and a quiet room.<p>

At least that was what Remus was telling himself.

It wasn't like the book was just being used as an attempted distraction from the impending sense of doom that was pooling in his stomach. Sirius would walk through that door at any minute and Remus wouldn't be able to hide the fact that he knew.

He had woken up last night, as Sirius was stroking his hair. He kept his eyes closed and didn't move but he could not help the noticeable easing of his tense features. He wondered what it meant and he half hoped that he knew already but he couldn't just say it.

There he was, bounding through the door like the excited puppy he was.

"Moony! Moony! Moony!"

Remus dragged his eyes to his and choked out his response.

"H-hey Pads."

James sat down across from them and raised an eyebrow.

"Prongsie?"

"Yes Pads?" James replied.

"Time is it?" Sirius replied just as he stuffed a mouthful of potato in his face.

"Uh...half past nine. Why?" James' eyes narrowed and he tilted his head.

"Just wondering."

"Wait what?! Shit, sorry guys I have to go see Madam Pomfrey," He looked down at his own watch, "thirty two minutes ago. Bye!" He dashed out the room before Sirius could even stop him.

"Well?" James said expectantly.

"Well what?"

"When the fuck are you going to talk to him about this?"

"About what, James? Use your words!"

"Okay, I saw you last night okay? With your whole 'no ones going to know I'm stroking my best friends hair' thing"

"W-what?"

"That's right, Pads, and you would be a fool to think he didn't feel the same about you so get off your fat arse and do something about it before I do! And for Merlin's sake wear a coat it's freezing!" James' shouted and Sirius thanked Merlin there weren't more people around.

"You're right James! And I don't need a coat! And just for the record my arse is not fat!" And with that he ran from the Great Hall to find his werewolf.

* * *

><p>So here they were. Sat on a freezing cold wall of awkwardness and icy breath. Remus looking adorable and cosy and Sirius looking like a more uncomfortable version of Sirius. Sirius turned to face the other boy.<p>

"Okay here's the deal. I like you. Not just as a friends either as like a romantic person that I want to kiss and hug and quite possibly screw until the sun goes down and then again until the sun comes back up. You are perfect and amazing and even though I am sat here in the fucking cold because I am an idiot and didn't bring a coat, you make me feel warm...and that's not just because I'm sat really close to your jumper right now."

Remus looked at him.

"I was awake."

"...What?"

"I was awake last night when you were...m-my hair."

"...You were awake." Sirius repeated.

"Yeah."

A silence fell over the boys as they slowly looked away from each other.

Remus was looking anywhere but Sirius. At the snow covered trees that swept slightly in the breeze. At the icy paths and snow banks that scattered the ground. Even following robins flying above their heads. But slowly, ever so slowly, he looked into the other boy's eyes.

Suddenly all control was lost. Sirius' lips crashed into his as a mixture of teeth and tongue met. His lips were soft and smooth compared to his own thin and cracked ones. Remus' head was pushed back with the force of the kiss and Sirius brought one hand up to rest at the base of his skull, holding him in place. Sirius' tongue suddenly darted out further, meeting with his as a firework of feeling exploded inside him. Sirius groaned and Remus reached up to run his fingers through his hair, teasing out knots and massaging his fingers as he went.

Then it was cold.

And they were falling.

"Come on, lovebirds, It's freezing out here!" James familiar voice rang out through the snow, followed by a certain red head's laugh, as Remus wiped the remains of the snowball from his face. Opening his eyes he realised that he was sat rather compromisingly across a certain dog animagi's lap.

"Well," Sirius started.

Remus pressed his lips to his again, shutting him up and cutting him off mid sentence.

"Sirius, stop talking."

As they were walking towards the castle, arms wrapped around each other, Remus couldn't help but hear James talking to Lily.

"You owe me five Galleons."

"Fuck off, James."


End file.
